Best Marvel and ‘Avengers’ Jokes for Kids

Calling all young superheroes! Get ready for some epic laughter with our ‘Best Marvel and Avengers Jokes for Kids!

If your little one is a fan of Iron Man, Captain America, or Spider-Man, these jokes will have them giggling faster than Hulk’s smashing punches.

From funny superhero one-liners to quirky puns about their favorite Avengers, this collection is sure to bring the fun to your Marvel-loving crew.

So, put on your cape, grab your shield, and let’s make your Instagram posts even more powerful with jokes that will have everyone in stitches!


Marvel Jokes Dirty

  • Why did Hulk break up with his girlfriend? Because she wasn’t his type, she was just too small!
  • Why does Thor always carry a hammer? To nail down his commitment!
  • How does Iron Man keep his secrets? He’s always got a “shield” for his feelings.
  • Why did Captain America break his diet? Because he couldn’t resist the temptation of the “shield” cake!
  • Why did Deadpool refuse to go to therapy? Because he already had a lot of “issues” to work through.
  • Why does Black Widow never tell secrets? Because she always “spills the beans” in the most dangerous way!
  • How do you know Spider-Man is great in bed? Because he’s always webbing up his partner!
  • What does Wolverine say after a dirty fight? “That’s claw-ful!”
  • What did Deadpool say when he got a promotion? “I’m feeling a little ‘Dead-icated’ now!”
  • Why doesn’t the Hulk tell dirty jokes? Because he doesn’t want to “smash” the conversation.
  • What do you call an inappropriate joke from Thor? A ‘thunderous’ one-liner.
  • Why did Black Panther get kicked out of the party? Because he brought out the claws!
  • What did Ant-Man do in bed? He “shrunk” the situation down to a mini-nightmare!
  • How did Star-Lord flirt with Gamora? He told her, “You can be the ‘star’ of my galaxy any time.”
  • What did Iron Man say after a night of too many drinks? “I’m feeling a bit ‘charged’ right now!”
  • Why did Vision need a break? Because he couldn’t “process” anymore dirty jokes.
  • What did Loki say to make everyone laugh? “I’m the god of mischief, and I’m mischief-ly funny!”
  • How did Rocket Raccoon flirt with someone? “Wanna go on a ‘wild’ adventure?”
  • Why doesn’t Doctor Strange ever tell dirty jokes? Because his magic is too “spellbinding” for such things!
  • How does Hawkeye make dirty jokes? He always aims for the “target” audience!

Best Picks

  1. “I’m feeling a bit ‘charged’ right now!” – Iron Man after a night out.
  2. “You can be the ‘star’ of my galaxy any time.” – Star-Lord flirting with Gamora.

Marvel Jokes for Adults

  • Why does Deadpool love puns? Because they’re always a “killer” joke!
  • What did Thor say when he got arrested? “I’m guilty of ‘hammering’ my way into trouble!”
  • Why is Iron Man always so sarcastic? Because he’s got a lot of “metal” in his attitude.
  • What did Black Widow say to Hawkeye? “Quit stringing me along, Clint!”
  • How does Captain America deal with his problems? He “throws” them away with his shield.
  • Why doesn’t Hulk like parties? Because he doesn’t know how to “smash” a good time.
  • What did Ant-Man say after a fight? “That was a ‘small’ victory!”
  • Why did Spider-Man stop telling jokes? Because he couldn’t handle the “web” of humor!
  • What did Deadpool call his stand-up comedy career? “Pun-derground comedy!”
  • Why does Doctor Strange never get embarrassed? Because his “magic” makes him immune to awkward moments.
  • How does Black Panther stay in shape? He does ‘claw’ exercises every morning!
  • What did Star-Lord say to Rocket? “Stop being so ‘squirrelly’ with the plan!”
  • Why did Vision refuse to go out with Wanda? Because he didn’t want to “disassemble” his feelings.
  • Why does Loki love pranks? Because he’s always up for a “godly” laugh.
  • How does Wolverine get his jokes out? With a “cut” to the punchline!
  • What did Captain Marvel say when she hit the gym? “Time to ‘blast’ through these sets!”
  • Why is Iron Man never surprised? Because he’s always “suit-ed” up for anything.
  • How does the Hulk prefer his jokes? Loud and “smash”-ing!
  • Why does Black Widow never go on first dates? Because she’s always playing “hard to get.”
  • Why did Doctor Strange end the date early? He couldn’t “focus” after his spell went wrong.

Best Picks

  1. “Pun-derground comedy!” – Deadpool’s take on his stand-up career.
  2. “Time to ‘blast’ through these sets!” – Captain Marvel after hitting the gym.

Superhero Jokes for Adults

  • Why did Batman break up with his girlfriend? Because she was too “Joker-ish” for him.
  • What did Spider-Man say at the bar? “Can I have a web-tini, please?”
  • Why doesn’t the Flash ever get caught? Because he’s always “rushing” into new jokes.
  • What does Aquaman say when he tells a joke? “That’s deep!”
  • Why did the Green Lantern always get in trouble? Because he had a “weak” sense of humor.
  • Why does Superman hate dirty jokes? Because they always fly over his head.
  • What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? “Stop flying around, you’re making me dizzy!”
  • Why doesn’t Green Lantern ever tell dirty jokes? He can never “green-light” them.
  • What did Captain America say about Thor? “He’s got the ‘hammer’ of comedy.”
  • Why doesn’t the Hulk ever use social media? Because his “rage” doesn’t fit the vibe.
  • What did Flash say after a workout? “That’s how I ‘run’ things around here!”
  • Why did Aquaman break up with his girlfriend? Because she was too “shallow.”
  • How does Captain America deal with his anger? He “throws” it around like his shield.
  • Why is Wonder Woman always the center of attention? Because she knows how to “lasso” up the crowd.
  • Why does The Flash never tell long jokes? He prefers “short” and sweet humor.
  • How did Batman propose to his girlfriend? With a “ring” that could knock anyone out!
  • Why does Superman hate parties? Because he always “super” overreacts.
  • What does Green Lantern say to get a laugh? “Let’s light up the room!”
  • Why does Iron Man hate math jokes? Because he can never “calculate” a punchline.
  • Why does Thor never tell dirty jokes? Because his humor is always “thunderously clean.”

Best Picks

  1. “That’s deep!” – Aquaman after telling a deep joke.
  2. “Let’s light up the room!” – Green Lantern’s take on humor.

Marvel Jokes Dark

  • Why did Thanos bring a lawnmower to the universe? Because he was “cutting” down the population.
  • Why does Doctor Strange always seem so serious? Because he’s seen too many “dark” possibilities.
  • What did Loki say when he lost a bet? “I’m in a ‘dark’ place now.”
  • Why did Black Widow go to therapy? Because she was “spying” on her own emotions.
  • How did Captain America deal with his PTSD? By “shielding” himself from the past.
  • Why does the Hulk prefer night fights? Because “smashing” in the dark feels more intense.
  • Why doesn’t Deadpool care about morality? Because he’s already “dead” inside.
  • Why did Iron Man build a robot butler? So it could “serve” him, even when he’s feeling cold.
  • How does Doctor Doom stay in control? By “doom-ing” everyone around him.
  • What did the X-Men say after a dark joke? “That’s just too ‘mutant’ for us!”
  • Why did the Winter Soldier break his watch? Because time is “frozen” in his mind.
  • How does Thanos make decisions? He just “snaps” to conclusions.
  • What did Black Panther say when things got tough? “Sometimes, the darkness feels like home.”
  • Why doesn’t the Joker get along with Thanos? Because Thanos always “ends” the joke.
  • Why did the Punisher keep a low profile? Because he didn’t want to “punish” the wrong person.
  • What does Magneto say when he’s in a bad mood? “I’m ‘magnetically’ drawn to chaos.”
  • Why does the Joker laugh at everything? Because he’s found the “dark” side of humor.
  • What did Deadpool say when things went wrong? “I guess it’s time for a ‘dead’pan delivery!”
  • How did Deadpool react when the world ended? “Guess I’ll have to ‘dead’ with this!”
  • What does Venom say after a dark joke? “That’s ‘biting’ humor.”

Best Picks

  1. “I guess it’s time for a ‘dead’pan delivery!” – Deadpool after a misfire.
  2. “That’s ‘biting’ humor.” – Venom’s dark joke reaction.

Superhero Puns One-Liners

  • Why is Spider-Man so good at making friends? Because he’s a “web” of connections!
  • Why did Iron Man get rejected at the restaurant? He was “too metallic” for the chef.
  • What did Captain America say about his new shield? “It’s ‘shield’ I can rely on.”
  • Why did the Hulk go to therapy? Because he had “smash” issues.
  • What does Captain Marvel say when she’s ready to fight? “Let’s ‘blast’ through this!”
  • Why did Thor bring a pencil to the battle? Because he was “drawing” his weapon.
  • What did Deadpool say when he tried acting? “I’m ‘dead’ serious about this role.”
  • Why doesn’t Ant-Man ever get lost? Because he knows how to “shrink” his problems.
  • How does Black Panther show love? With a “claw”-some hug!
  • Why does Doctor Strange love jokes? Because his humor is always “spellbinding.”
  • What did Deadpool say when he found a secret? “That’s a ‘dead’-icated secret.”
  • Why is Black Widow always in charge of the group? Because she knows how to “handle” the mission.
  • Why did Thor skip the comedy club? Because he’s always the “god” of the jokes.
  • How does the Flash stay in shape? He’s always “running” into new challenges.
  • Why did Deadpool get kicked out of school? Because he couldn’t stop making “pun-ishing” jokes.
  • What did Captain America say when he went skiing? “I’m ‘shield’-ing myself from the cold!”
  • How did Spider-Man get out of a sticky situation? With his “web” of tricks.
  • What did Hulk say when he couldn’t get a date? “Hulk smash loneliness!”
  • Why does Iron Man love puns? Because they’re always “suit”-ably funny.
  • Why did Doctor Strange refuse to take the joke seriously? Because it was too “magical” to be true.

Best Picks

  • “Let’s ‘blast’ through this!” – Captain Marvel ready for action.
  • “I’m ‘dead’ serious about this role.” – Deadpool on his acting skills.

Marvel Jokes Dirty

  • Why does Thor never get embarrassed? Because his jokes are always “hammered” in.
  • What did Spider-Man say to his date? “I’ll ‘web’ you up in no time!”
  • Why does Iron Man always get into trouble? Because he’s always “metal-ting” things up!
  • How does Captain America flirt? With a “shield” of confidence!
  • What did the Hulk say at a bar? “Smash the drinks, not the people!”
  • Why doesn’t Deadpool do well at comedy clubs? Because his humor is a little too “raw.”
  • How does Ant-Man get through a tough day? By “shrinking” his problems down.
  • Why did Black Widow leave the party early? Because she had “spy” duties.
  • How does Doctor Strange solve problems? With a “magical” twist.
  • Why did Vision never try online dating? He’s “too” perfect for algorithms.
  • What did Rocket Raccoon say to Groot? “Don’t just ‘tree’ me like that!”
  • Why doesn’t Thor ever tell inappropriate jokes? Because his humor is “godly” clean!
  • How did Black Panther flirt with a lady? “Let’s ‘claw’ our way through this night!”
  • Why did Deadpool like being a mercenary? Because he gets to “pun-ish” his enemies.
  • Why doesn’t Captain Marvel do “normal” jokes? Because she always “blasts” them too far!
  • What did Loki say when he was caught lying? “I’m ‘mischief’-ing around!”
  • Why did Spider-Man break up with his girlfriend? Because she was “web”-bing too much.
  • What did Iron Man say after a long day of work? “Time to suit up for a nap!”
  • Why did Doctor Strange always win at poker? Because his “magic” was unbeatable.
  • Why does the Hulk avoid clubs? Because he’s always “smashing” the furniture.

Best Picks

  • “I’ll ‘web’ you up in no time!” – Spider-Man on a date.
  • “Time to suit up for a nap!” – Iron Man after a long day.

Marvel Superheroes Jokes One Liners

  • Why did Spider-Man start a podcast? Because he’s always “webbing” new ideas.
  • What does Doctor Strange say when he’s done? “That’s a ‘magical’ wrap!”
  • Why doesn’t Captain America ever do puns? Because they’re too “shield-ed” for him.
  • How did Black Panther describe his mood? “Clawed” out of my mind today!
  • Why did Deadpool write a book? Because he’s a “pun-isher” in disguise.
  • What did Hulk say when he was bored? “Smash the boredom away!”
  • Why does Iron Man tell jokes? Because they’re always “suit”-ably funny.
  • What does Thor do on a bad day? “Hammer” out his frustrations.
  • Why did Ant-Man break up with his girlfriend? Because their relationship was “shrinking.”
  • What did Captain Marvel say when she got angry? “Time to ‘blast’ some attitude!”
  • How does Spider-Man relax? By “webbing” up a good book.
  • Why did Loki get kicked out of the comedy club? Because he was “mischief-ing” with the mic.
  • How does Black Widow keep things fresh? By “spying” on the latest trends.
  • Why did Doctor Strange go to the dance? Because he knew how to “twist” the moves.
  • How does Iron Man keep up with trends? By “suiting” up for the latest one.
  • Why did Hulk start a cooking show? Because he wanted to “smash” the competition.
  • What did Thor say after the party? “It’s hammer time!”
  • How did Rocket Raccoon spend his time off? By “groot-ing” around town!
  • Why did Deadpool stay in the hotel room? **Because he was “pun”-ctually

Marvel Superheroes Jokes Dirty

  • Why did Deadpool refuse to go on a date with the Scarlet Witch? Because he couldn’t handle the “chaos” in her love life.
  • Why is Black Widow always the center of attention? Because she knows how to “pull” everyone in.
  • What did Iron Man say to Black Widow on their first date? “I’ll ‘suit’ you just fine.”
  • Why doesn’t Captain America tell dirty jokes? Because he’s too “clean-cut” for that.
  • What did Thor say after a long night out? “I’m feeling ‘hammered’ right now.”
  • How did Hulk deal with his anger? He “smashes” his emotions down.
  • Why did Spider-Man break up with his girlfriend? Because she couldn’t handle his “web” of lies.
  • Why does Deadpool always have a good time? Because he’s always “dead” serious about fun.
  • What did Captain Marvel say to Iron Man? “You’re the ‘metal’ to my energy.”
  • Why did Black Panther go to the comedy club? Because he loves a “claw-some” time.
  • Why doesn’t Ant-Man ever get embarrassed? Because he’s always able to “shrink” his problems.
  • How did Doctor Strange seduce his partner? By casting a “charming” spell.
  • Why does Deadpool never get serious? Because he always “snaps” back with a joke.
  • Why did Thor flirt with Jane Foster? Because he thought she was a “goddess” in bed.
  • What does Hulk say when he’s in a bad mood? “I’m going to ‘smash’ this problem!”
  • Why did Vision start a podcast? Because his humor is “out of this world.”
  • How does Rocket Raccoon break the ice on a date? With a “wild” sense of humor.
  • What did Loki say after a good joke? “You’ve been ‘mischief-ed.’”
  • Why doesn’t Wolverine like dirty jokes? Because his claws just “cut” too deep.
  • How does Spider-Man keep things exciting? By “webbing” up new tricks every time.

Best Picks

  • “I’m feeling ‘hammered’ right now.” – Thor after a night out.
  • “You’re the ‘metal’ to my energy.” – Captain Marvel to Iron Man.

Marvel Superheroes Jokes for Adults

  • Why did Deadpool bring a ladder to the bar? Because he wanted to “raise” the stakes.
  • What did Thor say after his third drink? “I’m ‘hammered,’ but I’m still worthy!”
  • Why did Black Widow leave the party? Because it wasn’t “classified” enough for her.
  • Why does Doctor Strange never tell dirty jokes? Because he’s already mastered the “dark arts” of humor.
  • What did Iron Man say after a breakup? “I’m ‘suit-ed’ for a solo adventure now.”
  • Why did Captain America stop dating? Because his love life was always on the “line of duty.”
  • Why doesn’t Deadpool trust people who tell dirty jokes? Because they’re usually “risky” business.
  • What did Spider-Man say to Black Widow? “I’m all tangled up in you.”
  • Why doesn’t Captain America tell dirty jokes? Because he’s too busy saving the “world” from bad humor.
  • How does Thor get rid of stress? By “hammering” out all his issues.
  • Why does Black Panther have a dark sense of humor? Because he’s always in the “shadow” of greatness.
  • Why did Deadpool make a joke about Thanos? Because he’s got a “snap” of humor.
  • What did Iron Man say after a good joke? “I’m just ‘suit-ed’ for laughs.”
  • Why did Captain Marvel reject the job offer? Because she’s already got a “blast” career!
  • Why does Doctor Strange never go to comedy clubs? Because he prefers “magical” humor over standard jokes.
  • What does Loki say about his comedy style? “It’s ‘mischievously’ funny.”
  • How did Deadpool get a crowd to laugh? By “snapping” into character.
  • Why does Ant-Man love dirty jokes? Because he can always “shrink” them down.
  • How does Hulk stay in shape? By “smashing” his workouts every day.
  • Why did Doctor Doom leave the party? Because he “doom-ed” the mood with his seriousness.

Best Picks

  • “I’m just ‘suit-ed’ for laughs.” – Iron Man after a good joke.
  • “It’s ‘mischievously’ funny.” – Loki on his humor style.

Best Marvel Superheroes Jokes

  • What did Spider-Man say to his date? “I’m caught up in your web of charm.”
  • Why did Iron Man get rejected at the comedy club? Because his jokes were “metal-lically” cold.
  • What does Thor do when he’s feeling down? “Hammer” out his frustrations.
  • Why did Black Widow leave the party? Because she was too “classified” for the crowd.
  • Why did Captain America start a YouTube channel? To “shield” his fan base from negativity.
  • How did Hulk react after losing a game? “I’m ‘smashing’ this controller!”
  • Why did Deadpool break up with his girlfriend? Because she couldn’t handle his “raw” humor.
  • Why does Ant-Man avoid awkward situations? Because he knows how to “shrink” the tension.
  • What did Doctor Strange say to Iron Man? “You may have the suit, but I have the magic!”
  • Why did Rocket Raccoon want to become a comedian? Because his humor is always “wild” and unpredictable.
  • Why does Spider-Man avoid Netflix? Because he can’t stop “webbing” through every episode.
  • Why did Deadpool start his own podcast? To “pun-ish” his audience with jokes.
  • How did Captain America cheer up Thor? By telling him “there’s no ‘hammer’ in your heart.”
  • Why doesn’t Black Panther like party jokes? Because he’s always in the “shadow” of seriousness.
  • What did Vision say when he heard a good joke? “That’s truly ‘vision-ary’ humor!”
  • Why did Doctor Doom get kicked out of the party? Because he was too “doom-ing” about everything.
  • What did Loki say after cracking a joke? “I told you, I’m the god of mischief!”
  • How did Ant-Man handle a bad joke? He just “shrunk” the situation.
  • Why doesn’t the Hulk go to comedy clubs? Because he “smashes” every joke.
  • What did Iron Man say after a night out? “I’m ‘charged’ for round two!”

Best Picks

  • “I’m caught up in your web of charm.” – Spider-Man on a date.
  • “That’s truly ‘vision-ary’ humor!” – Vision after hearing a good joke.

Marvel Jokes for Kids

  • Why is Spider-Man so good at making friends? Because he’s great at “webbing” up relationships!
  • Why did Thor get a job at the bakery? Because he’s good at “hammering” out dough!
  • What does Captain America do when he’s tired? He takes a break and “throws” himself a nap.
  • Why does Iron Man always know what to do? Because he’s got a “suit” for every situation!
  • How does Black Widow stay in shape? She “spies” on her workouts!
  • Why did the Hulk bring a towel to the gym? Because he wanted to “smash” his workout routine!
  • Why does Deadpool like school? Because he’s always “pun”-ishing the teachers with jokes!
  • What did Ant-Man say to his friend? “I may be small, but I’m ‘big’ on fun!”
  • Why does Doctor Strange love magic? Because his “spells” always make people laugh!
  • How does Rocket Raccoon make new friends? By sharing his “wild” sense of humor!
  • Why did Spider-Man stop eating candy? Because he didn’t want to get “webbed” up in sugar!
  • What does Thor say to kids at the playground? “Let’s have a ‘hammer’-time!”
  • Why does Captain Marvel love space? Because she can always “blast” off into adventure!
  • Why does the Flash like to race? Because he’s always “rushing” to win!
  • How did Hulk make a friend? By “smashing” through the awkwardness!
  • Why does Black Panther prefer the jungle? Because it’s always “clawsome” there!
  • Why does Iron Man like to read? Because his “suit” never gets bored!
  • What did Ant-Man say when he won a race? “That was ‘shrinking’-ly fast!”
  • Why does Doctor Strange never get lost? Because he always knows the “magical” way!
  • Why did Captain America love school? Because he always “led” the class!

Best Picks

  • “Let’s have a ‘hammer’-time!” – Thor at the playground.
  • “That was ‘shrinking’-ly fast!” – Ant-Man after a race.

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