470+Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Puns A Fun Way To Tackle Your Day

If you’re a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu enthusiast, you know the importance of having a good sense of humor, both on and off the mat.

If you’re rolling with your training partners or just kicking back, these BJJ puns are perfect for lightening the mood.

From hilarious one-liners to Instagram-worthy captions, this collection of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu puns will have you tapping out in laughter.

So, if you’re ready to choke on some giggles, let’s dive into some of the funniest and most creative BJJ jokes to share with your friends or on your social media!


Jiu Jitsu Jokes One Liners

Here are some hilarious one-liner jokes to roll with.

  • Why don’t BJJ practitioners ever get lost? They always know how to find the guard.
  • What’s a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu fighter’s favorite type of pasta? Tortellini, because it looks like a triangle choke.
  • Why did the BJJ student bring a ladder to class? He wanted to work on his guard passing.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s least favorite vegetable? Cabbage, because it’s too easy to wrap up.
  • Why did the grappler refuse to leave the party? He was having too much fun in the closed guard.
  • What did the BJJ fighter say at the end of a long match? “I’m tapped out!”
  • Why are Jiu-Jitsu classes like a good movie? They’re full of unexpected plot twists.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite holiday? Christmas – because everyone loves a good roll.
  • Why did the BJJ player go to therapy? To work through their submission issues.
  • What do BJJ practitioners bring to a barbecue? Chokes and snacks.
  • How do BJJ fighters avoid traffic? They always take the guard.
  • Why do BJJ fighters make terrible secret agents? They can never stop rolling with the punches.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite board game? Twister, for obvious reasons.
  • Why don’t BJJ fighters ever get lonely? They’re always surrounded by a good guard.
  • What did the BJJ coach say to the wrestler? “You may be strong, but I can tie you up in knots.”
  • How do Jiu-Jitsu practitioners keep their cool? They always know how to choke out stress.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter start a podcast? To help others tap into their potential.
  • What did the coach say to the tired student? “Time to tap out… but not from the lesson!”
  • Why did the purple belt refuse dessert? He didn’t want to get choked by the calories.
  • What’s the best way to catch up with a BJJ friend? Just roll by their gym.

Best Picks

  • “I’m tapped out!” – A perfect one-liner to use after a long, exhausting day.
  • “Chokes and snacks.” – Ideal for a fun barbecue or hangout with BJJ friends.
  • “Time to tap out… but not from the lesson!” – A clever way to stay positive after a long training session.

Jiu Jitsu Jokes Reddit

If you’re hanging out on Reddit and looking for the best BJJ jokes, check out these classics.

  • Why don’t BJJ fighters make good comedians? Their jokes always get submitted.
  • What do you call a BJJ fighter who can’t submit anyone? A purple belt in disguise.
  • Why did the Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu fighter always bring a pencil to class? He wanted to draw a good guard.
  • How do you know if a BJJ fighter is lying? Their story always has a choke hold on the truth.
  • Why do BJJ fighters like to go to the beach? They love the idea of working on their beach guard.
  • How does a Jiu-Jitsu fighter order a coffee? With a side of choke and submission.
  • What do you call a rolling session that goes on forever? A never-ending choke.
  • Why was the BJJ practitioner always calm in an emergency? He knew how to keep things under control.
  • What did the BJJ fighter say to the offensive wrestler? “Tap out, and you’ll feel better.”
  • Why did the BJJ practitioner leave the restaurant early? He was in a hurry to pass the guard.
  • What’s the favorite drink of a BJJ fighter? A submission shake.
  • How do Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu fighters stay in shape? They keep their guard up at all times.
  • Why do BJJ fighters excel in math? They know how to solve problems with the perfect submission.
  • What do BJJ practitioners always bring to a party? Their favorite submission move.
  • Why did the white belt always bring a blanket to class? He wanted to stay warm in the guard.
  • What did the coach say about the student who could never get their guard right? “You need to work on your ground game.”
  • Why do BJJ fighters never get upset? They know how to tap out their frustrations.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat to roll to.
  • Why don’t BJJ fighters ever get lost in a crowd? They always stick to their guard.
  • How did the BJJ practitioner impress the date? By showing off a flawless triangle choke.

Best Picks

  • “Their jokes always get submitted.” – A funny take on how BJJ fighters deal with humor.
  • “You need to work on your ground game.” – A classic coaching line for the aspiring BJJ player.
  • “Tap out, and you’ll feel better.” – Great for diffusing tension and making light of a situation.

Jiu Jitsu Memes

Looking for some BJJ memes to make you laugh out loud? Here are some!

  • “I don’t need a cape, I have a gi.” – BJJ: the real superhero’s choice.
  • “How do you stop a choke?” Tap… or tap out.
  • “You know you’re a true BJJ addict when…” You start dreaming of guard sweeps.
  • “BJJ: The only sport where you get a hug after getting choked.” We’re a community, not a competition.
  • “Just finished rolling. Here’s the plan: bed. Now.” The grind never stops… unless it’s for a nap.
  • “Why is BJJ the best? Because everything else is just a roll in the park.” Except it’s a submission park.
  • “If at first you don’t succeed, try a different guard position.” That’s the BJJ way!
  • “Training BJJ is like being in a relationship.” Sometimes you’re in mount, sometimes you’re in the doghouse.
  • “I only tap out if it’s to my favorite submission.” Otherwise, I’m rolling forever.
  • “Just rolled for three hours, now I’m sore for three days.” But totally worth it.
  • “You know you’re a BJJ fanatic when…” You can’t get out of bed without doing a shrimping drill.
  • “Sometimes my guard is like a movie.” I can’t believe it’s still going on.
  • “I asked for a drink at the bar, and they gave me a triangle choke.” Bartenders know what’s up.
  • “You’ve been submitted so many times today, you could probably write a book.” About all my failures in BJJ.
  • “Who needs sleep when you have an armbar waiting for you?” Priorities.
  • “Does this gi make me look like I can tap out a black belt?” Just roll with it.
  • “I don’t always get submitted… but when I do, it’s by a white belt.” It happens to the best of us.
  • “I could have been anything, but I chose to be in guard.” Best decision ever.
  • “If I had a dollar for every time I’ve been submitted…” I’d still be broke, but at least I’d be tapping out in style.
  • “BJJ: Where you tap out but still feel like a winner.” That’s the spirit!

Best Picks

  • “I don’t need a cape, I have a gi.” – A fun meme for any true BJJ superhero.
  • “BJJ: The only sport where you get a hug after getting choked.” – Perfect for showing the camaraderie of the sport.
  • “Training BJJ is like being in a relationship.” – Funny, relatable, and totally on point for the struggles of grappling!

Brazilian Jiu Jitsu Puns One Liners

Here are more Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu one-liner puns to keep the laughs rolling.

  • Why don’t BJJ fighters ever get angry? They know how to tap out their frustration.
  • How does a BJJ fighter make decisions? They just go with the flow – and the submission.
  • Why was the BJJ student always calm? Because they had mastered their inner guard.
  • What’s the best way to lose weight in BJJ? Roll your way into submission.
  • Why do BJJ practitioners love a good workout? It’s all about breaking a sweat… or an armbar.
  • What did the BJJ fighter say to their opponent after a tap out? “You tapped, but it was a tap dance!”
  • Why don’t BJJ fighters use maps? They always find their guard, no matter where they are.
  • How do BJJ practitioners handle stress? By putting it in a rear-naked choke.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter join a band? Because they’re great at rolling with the beat.
  • What do you call a broken BJJ move? A tap-out gone wrong.
  • Why did the BJJ student bring a towel to class? Because they knew they’d be dripping with sweat from the guard work.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter start a podcast? To choke out the competition with their great content.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s motto? Tap early, tap often.
  • How did the BJJ student feel after their first submission? Tapped out but satisfied.
  • Why do BJJ fighters love camping? Because they love rolling in the grass.
  • What do BJJ fighters do at the beach? They practice their closed guard on the sand.
  • What’s the difference between a white belt and a black belt? The black belt knows how to laugh at themselves after tapping out.
  • What do BJJ fighters wear to dinner? A gi and some guard work.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter become a baker? Because they’re great at rolling dough.
  • What do you call a BJJ practitioner’s worst enemy? A good leg lock.

Best Picks

  • “They know how to tap out their frustration.” – A hilarious way to deal with stress.
  • “Tap early, tap often.” – Classic BJJ wisdom with a funny twist.
  • “They’re great at rolling with the beat.” – Combining the love of BJJ and music in one pun.

Short Brazilian Jiu Jitsu Puns

Here are some short, snappy BJJ puns to brighten your day.

  • Why don’t BJJ fighters get nervous? They always have a choke hold on the situation.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite color? Purple, because it’s the color of submission.
  • How do BJJ fighters stay fit? By rolling with the punches.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter go to the gym? To improve their guard muscles.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite animal? A boa, because of the choke.
  • Why are BJJ practitioners always in a good mood? Because they’re always in top position.
  • How do BJJ fighters keep their heads cool? They practice deep guard breathing.
  • Why do BJJ fighters love nature? Because it’s all about finding your guard in the wild.
  • How do you know a BJJ fighter is at a party? They’re always in the center of attention, in guard.
  • Why are BJJ fighters always good with knots? They tie up their opponents for fun.
  • What do BJJ fighters say after a hard roll? “That was a choke-full experience!”
  • Why did the BJJ practitioner wear a cap? To keep their guard tight.
  • What did the BJJ fighter bring to the picnic? A submission move for everyone.
  • How does a BJJ fighter clean their house? With a sweep, of course!
  • Why was the BJJ fighter always prepared? They never missed a roll.
  • What did the BJJ fighter do at the beach? Worked on their guard… on the sand.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter sit out? They were resting in guard.
  • What’s the BJJ fighter’s favorite workout? Armbar press.
  • How do BJJ fighters celebrate? By tapping out in style.
  • Why do BJJ fighters hate traffic? Because they can’t pass the guard.

Best Picks

  • “They always have a choke hold on the situation.” – Simple but effective for a quick laugh.
  • “Purple, because it’s the color of submission.” – Short, sweet, and to the point for any BJJ fan.
  • “They tie up their opponents for fun.” – A clever and quick joke that gets straight to the point.

Brazilian Jiu Jitsu Puns Reddit

If you’re looking for more BJJ puns on Reddit, you’ve come to the right place. Here are some of the best ones:

  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite pastime? Rolling through life.
  • How do BJJ practitioners survive a boring meeting? They always have a guard to fall back on.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter break up with their partner? They couldn’t pass the relationship guard.
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite dance? The tap-out tango.
  • How do you know if someone’s a BJJ practitioner? They’re always talking about guard work.
  • What’s the worst thing about a BJJ fighter’s diet? They’re always hungry for submissions.
  • What did the BJJ fighter bring to the comedy show? A choke-worthy performance.
  • Why don’t BJJ fighters ever tell secrets? They know how to lock it down.
  • What do you call a BJJ practitioner’s favorite snack? A submission snack.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter quit their job? Because they needed to tap out.
  • What’s the hardest part of being a BJJ fighter? Getting out of bed for another roll.
  • What did the BJJ fighter do on their day off? Practice guard sweeps in the living room.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter get into real estate? Because they’re great at passing the guard… and deals.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter bring their gi to the wedding? Because they wanted to tie the knot!
  • What’s a BJJ fighter’s favorite fruit? Guava, because it’s easy to peel.
  • How does a BJJ fighter clean their house? With a perfect sweep.
  • Why do BJJ fighters make terrible chefs? They’re always choking their food.
  • What do you call a BJJ fighter who loves puns? A tap-out comedian.
  • Why was the BJJ fighter late to class? They got stuck in traffic… in guard.
  • How do BJJ fighters handle a tough opponent? They just tap and go back for more.

Best Picks

  • “Rolling through life.” – A fun way to describe the ups and downs of life for a BJJ fighter.
  • “They’re always hungry for submissions.” – A classic hunger pun, but for submissions!
  • “They wanted to tie the knot!” – A wedding-themed BJJ pun for those who like a good laugh at celebrations.

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Puns One Liners

  • I tried to avoid the triangle choke, but it was a real bind. Guess it’s no way out!
  • Why did the grappler go to therapy? He had too many issues to pin down.
  • I wasn’t sure about my Jiu-Jitsu skills, but now I’m starting to feel submission to it. No regrets.
  • What did the Jiu-Jitsu fighter say at the grocery store? “I’m just here to grab a couple of rolls.”
  • My favorite move is the armbar. It’s really a pain in the neck for my opponents.
  • I tried to make my opponent tap out, but he didn’t submit to it. Guess it was all in vain!
  • What’s a Jiu-Jitsu fighter’s favorite part of a puzzle? The pieces that fit perfectly – just like a good guard!
  • I tried to escape the armbar, but it really got under my skin. Literally.
  • The choke was so tight, I almost tapped out to my own breathlessness!
  • Why do Jiu-Jitsu fighters love bread? Because they’re all about those rolls.
  • I’m not saying I’m good at Jiu-Jitsu, but I know how to make an impact in any situation. Like a body slam.
  • How does a Jiu-Jitsu fighter say goodbye? “I’ll catch you in the guard!”
  • When the fight was over, I told my opponent, “It’s a wrap!”
  • I don’t always train Jiu-Jitsu, but when I do, I’m always looking for an escape.
  • BJJ is like a relationship – it takes a lot of work and sometimes a little bit of choking.
  • I think I’ve got a sweeping personality. That’s what I tell my opponents.
  • Why was the Jiu-Jitsu fighter always late? Because he was too busy guarding his time.
  • BJJ is a lot like chess, except the pieces fight back.
  • That submission was so slick, it was practically a sneak attack.
  • Why did the BJJ fighter refuse to drive? He was tired of getting caught in traffic.

Best Picks

  • “I tried to avoid the triangle choke, but it was a real bind. Guess it’s no way out!
  • “I wasn’t sure about my Jiu-Jitsu skills, but now I’m starting to feel submission to it. No regrets.

Short Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Puns

  • What do you call a lazy grappler? A tap artist.
  • I was on a roll in Jiu-Jitsu. Literally, just eating sushi between sessions!
  • What’s a BJJ black belt’s favorite movie? The Choke is the Final Cut.
  • I tried to escape, but the lock was too tight. Guess it was a knot today!
  • I heard the BJJ seminar was a big hit. They really nailed it.
  • Why don’t Jiu-Jitsu fighters ever fight over parking spaces? They’re always working on their guard.
  • My Jiu-Jitsu instructor said I was knot bad. I guess that’s a compliment?
  • Why did the BJJ fighter become a chef? He had a knack for making things roll!
  • My opponent was on fire today – literally. I couldn’t choke on it.
  • I’m a master at the ankle lock. That’s how I step up my game.
  • What do you call a Jiu-Jitsu match on a hot day? A sweat session.
  • I’m not great at submissions, but I sure know how to tap out.
  • I tried a new move today – it was risky but it worked!
  • I gave it all I had, but still got caught in the grip.
  • We were rolling, and I felt an instant connection – like a choke!
  • That submission was so smooth, it was like silk – slip away.
  • BJJ is a lot like love – once you lock in, you never want to tap out.
  • I’m in a good mood, just rolling with it.
  • That submission felt like slow motion – so perfect.
  • Why do BJJ fighters love winter? Because they’re all about the cold sweeps.

Best Picks

  • “What do you call a lazy grappler? A tap artist.
  • “BJJ is a lot like love – once you lock in, you never want to tap out.”

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Puns Reddit

  • “I’m just here for the rolls, not the drama.” #BJJlife
  • “When your armbar is better than your WiFi signal.” #TappingIn
  • “That feeling when you finally get the choke right: #Victory.”
  • “I thought I was good, but my guard game needs work.” #RedditBJJ
  • “Did you hear about the BJJ fighter who couldn’t get enough of submissions? He was addicted to taps!”
  • “It’s not just a mat; it’s a place to roll and find clarity.
  • “Did you hear about the choke that went wrong? It was a knot good situation.
  • “How many taps does it take to make a true champion? More than I thought.
  • “When you roll with the black belts, you can’t help but tap into your potential.”
  • “Why does Jiu-Jitsu feel so empowering? Because it’s all about the grip!
  • “I just got submitted by a lighter guy – guess I fell for it.
  • “My guard game is pretty good – at least that’s what the red belts keep telling me.”
  • “I was almost submitted, but I did a great escape – just like Houdini.”
  • “BJJ: Where it’s all about getting to the top, but it’s hard to stay there.”
  • “Just got my black belt. It’s like a dream, but with a lot of tapping.”
  • “Nothing like a choke to remind you that submission is always the key.”
  • “The only thing more terrifying than being choked out? The tap-out afterward.
  • “BJJ fighters aren’t afraid of hard work, just hard taps.”
  • “BJJ Reddit is where you find the most submissions – and the most excuses.”
  • “I finally passed the guard – feels amazing! #Progress.”

Best Picks

  • “I just got submitted by a lighter guy – guess I fell for it.
  • “When you roll with the black belts, you can’t help but tap into your potential.”

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Puns for Instagram

  • “Life’s a roll – just tap into it.”
  • “Every choke is a step closer to greatness. #BJJgrind
  • “Train hard, roll harder. #BJJlove
  • “Jiu-Jitsu isn’t just a sport; it’s a way of life. #InTheGuard
  • “That awkward moment when you tap out to a beginner.”
  • “Jiu-Jitsu is my therapy. No couch needed.
  • “When life gets tough, just go for the guard. #JiuJitsuLife
  • “Jiu-Jitsu: where your best friend could also be your worst enemy.”
  • “The best way to clear your head? Roll! #BJJtherapy”
  • “I can’t be defeated – but I can be tapped out.”
  • “Grapple and let go. #RollAndLearn
  • “I just love that feeling of rolling into success.”
  • “Jiu-Jitsu, where tapping is celebrated – but not your opponent.”
  • “You know you’ve made it when you can choke out your own ego. #BJJlevelUp
  • “Can’t sleep? Just dream of guard passes.”
  • “You don’t need a cape when you’ve got a gi. #BJJhero
  • “Nothing’s better than a good roll to clear your head.”
  • “Tap, breathe, repeat. #BJJjourney
  • “Jiu-Jitsu is like a puzzle – except the pieces fight back.”
  • “The art of rolling: It’s more than just a workout, it’s life. #BJJLove

Best Picks

  • “Life’s a roll – just tap into it.”
  • “Jiu-Jitsu: where your best friend could also be your worst enemy.”

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Puns Captions

  • “If Jiu-Jitsu were easy, they’d call it ballet.”
  • “Jiu-Jitsu isn’t just a sport; it’s a lifestyle. #MatRat
  • “Get tapped in and roll with the punches. #BJJBeast
  • “Training hard today – making tapouts look easy.”
  • “Rolling into another week like a champion. #RollAndLearn
  • “Can’t wait to roll, just tap and let go.”
  • “It’s all about finding your flow, one guard pass at a time.”
  • “BJJ: where everyone’s a black belt – even when you’re a white belt!”
  • “Tap, breathe, repeat. That’s the Jiu-Jitsu life.
  • “No gi, no problem – still tapping out opponents.”
  • “Feeling the sweat, but it’s all part of the journey!”
  • “Jiu-Jitsu: Not just about winning, it’s about learning through tapping.”
  • “Rolling with the punches. #BJJGrind
  • “I only tap out when I’ve learned something new. #JiuJitsuIsLife
  • “They say a tap is just a step towards victory. #RollHard
  • “BJJ is a lifestyle – the tap is just part of the journey. #WorkHard
  • “Rolling into success, one tap at a time.”
  • “Just rolled into the weekend – feeling tapped and ready for more.”
  • “In Jiu-Jitsu, we don’t lose, we just tap and learn.”
  • “Jiu-Jitsu: More than just rolling, it’s a way of life. #MatLife

Best Picks

  • “If Jiu-Jitsu were easy, they’d call it ballet.”
  • “Rolling into success, one tap at a time.”

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