Get ready to break the fourth wall and bust a gut with ‘Deadpool Puns!’ 🩸💥 Just like the Merc with a Mouth himself, these puns are sharp, snarky, and downright hilarious.
If you’re a die-hard fan of Wade Wilson’s wisecracks or just love a good mix of sarcasm and slapstick, these puns will have you laughing harder than Deadpool regenerating from a bad decision.
From chimichanga jokes to superhero roasts, this collection is packed with maximum effort humor.
So, put on your red suit, grab a snack, and let’s get pun-ishingly funny!”
Deadpool Puns One Liners
- Deadpool’s favorite type of exercise? “Dead-lifts.”
- Why did Deadpool become a chef? Because he’s great at ‘knife-ing’ around.
- Deadpool doesn’t need therapy; he just “has a lot of issues.”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite type of comedy? “One-liners.”
- Why does Deadpool never play cards? He’s always dealing with issues.
- Deadpool’s favorite pasta? “Spaghetti… it’s just to die for!”
- Deadpool isn’t afraid of the dark, he’s afraid of “the pun.”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite snack? “Dead-tater chips.”
- When Deadpool gets cold, he always says, “I’m not dead, I’m just chilling.”
- What do you call Deadpool with a sword? “A sharp individual.”
- Deadpool walked into a bar… but he’s already a punchline.
- How did Deadpool’s comedy career start? With a bang!
- Deadpool’s favorite type of film? “Action-packed, with plenty of punchlines!”
- Why doesn’t Deadpool do stand-up? He’s always pun-ishing the crowd.
- What did Deadpool do after eating spicy food? “Dead-pool of tears.”
- Why did Deadpool break up with the calendar? “He was out of dates.”
- Deadpool likes to stay sharp. “No dull moments, ever.”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite holiday? “Dead of winter!”
- Deadpool doesn’t trust stairs. “They’re always up to something.”
- Why did Deadpool open a bakery? “For the dough!”
Best Picks:
- “Deadpool’s favorite pasta? ‘Spaghetti… it’s just to die for!'”
- “Deadpool doesn’t trust stairs. ‘They’re always up to something.'”
Deadpool Puns Reddit
- Deadpool can’t find his way around Reddit. “I’m lost in the meme-sphere.”
- Why did Deadpool take over Reddit? Because it’s full of ‘Dead-ends.’
- Deadpool’s favorite subreddit? “r/Deadpoolpuns.”
- Why doesn’t Deadpool upvote everything? “I’m not a fan of ‘deadbeats’.”
- Deadpool doesn’t like downvotes. “They’re a real killer for the mood.”
- What does Deadpool say about Reddit? “It’s full of karma, but no one dies.”
- Why did Deadpool get banned on Reddit? For excessive ‘pun-ishing.’
- What did Deadpool say about Reddit memes? “They’re so dead, they’re almost funny.”
- Deadpool loves a good Reddit debate. “Especially when it’s about me.”
- What does Deadpool think of Reddit’s mods? “They’re the real heroes, no cap.”
- Deadpool’s idea of a good Reddit thread? “One where everyone’s dead on arrival.”
- What did Deadpool say to the Redditor complaining? “Don’t be a pun-derdog.”
- Deadpool likes Reddit for the same reason he loves chimichangas. “Both are spicy and full of surprises.”
- What’s Deadpool’s secret to Reddit fame? “Post and pray!”
- Deadpool’s favorite Reddit meme? “The one with me in it!”
- Deadpool says Reddit is the best place to find “deadly puns.”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite subreddit category? “Pun-ishment!”
- Why is Deadpool obsessed with Reddit? “I’m a legend in my own meme!”
- Deadpool’s Reddit profile? “Deadpool-DeadlyPuns!”
- Why does Deadpool love Reddit threads? “They’re full of dead ends and laughs.”
Best Picks:
- “Deadpool’s favorite subreddit? ‘r/Deadpoolpuns.'”
- “Deadpool says Reddit is the best place to find ‘deadly puns.'”
Deadpool Puns Captions
- “I’m not dead, just dead tired.”
- “Did someone say chimichangas? Oh wait, it was me.”
- “Keep calm and let Deadpool handle it.”
- “Making jokes and taking names.”
- “You can’t handle the pun-ishment.”
- “Deadpool: where the only thing quicker than my wit is my healing factor.”
- “Deadpool’s got a lot of issues, but none that can’t be fixed with a good pun.”
- “No cap, just chimichangas.”
- “Why be normal when you can be Deadpool?”
- “I’m here for the laughs, not the danger… well, maybe a little danger.”
- “Eat my sword. Wait, I’ll eat it first.”
- “Ready to be Deadpool-ed.”
- “Don’t hate me because I’m ‘pun’ny.”
- “Wade Wilson: making puns, taking names.”
- “Deadpool doesn’t do normal. Normal’s boring.”
- “Warning: Puns ahead, proceed with caution.”
- “This isn’t a selfie, it’s a ‘dead-fie’.”
- “Like a chimichanga, I’m spicy and unpredictable.”
- “Got sword, will travel.”
- “If I’m not your type, you need a new type.”
Best Picks:
- “Deadpool: where the only thing quicker than my wit is my healing factor.”
- “Like a chimichanga, I’m spicy and unpredictable.”
Short Funny Deadpool Quotes
- “Life is an endless series of trainwrecks with only brief commercial-like breaks of happiness.”
- “I’m not a hero. I’m just a guy who gets paid to wear red.”
- “I’m gonna do what they call a ‘dirty taco’.”
- “You know, if I had a nickel for every time I saved the world… I’d still be broke.”
- “I’m just a bad guy who loves a good chimichanga.”
- “Why don’t I give a flying f—? Because I’m Deadpool, that’s why.”
- “You know what’s funny? Everything about me.”
- “I’m not a superhero. I’m a ‘super’ mess.”
- “You wanna hear a joke? Here’s one: life.”
- “I don’t have time for this. I’m too busy being awesome.”
- “Let’s face it, you’re probably not going to survive.”
- “Just because I’m a mercenary doesn’t mean I’m not a good person.”
- “I’m not dead, I’m just… taking a nap.”
- “My ex was like a wrecking ball. If a wrecking ball had a terrible personality.”
- “I’ve never been more alive… or more confused.”
- “Not all heroes wear capes. Some wear red spandex.”
- “You might want to back off before I decide to crack a joke.”
- “If you want to be a hero, first you gotta make a killer joke.”
- “I was born to be a pun-isher.”
- “I’m not dead yet… still trying to find my way out of this movie.”
Best Picks:
- “I’m not a hero. I’m just a guy who gets paid to wear red.”
- “Just because I’m a mercenary doesn’t mean I’m not a good person.”
Deadpool Jokes for Kids
- Why did Deadpool bring a pencil to the party? Because he wanted to draw some attention!
- What does Deadpool call his best friend? “Chimichango.”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite toy? “The sword in the toy box!”
- Why is Deadpool always on time? “Because he’s a super speedy superhero!”
- What did Deadpool say to his buddy? “You’re the best thing since sliced chimichangas!”
- What do you get if you cross Deadpool with a computer? “A pun-derful machine!”
- Why did Deadpool refuse to get a pet? “Because I’m already too ‘paws-itively’ awesome!”
- What did Deadpool say when he was hungry? “Where’s my chimichanga, stat!”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite season? “Spicy, winter chili season!”
- Why did Deadpool never go to school? “Because he was too busy saving the world!”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite hobby? “Cracking jokes and breaking hearts!”
- Why doesn’t Deadpool play hide and seek? “Because he’s always found—too punny to miss!”
- How does Deadpool get his morning coffee? “With a side of ‘pun’—lots of it!”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite animal? “A chimichanga bird!”
- Why can’t Deadpool ever keep a secret? “Because he always ‘sword’ everything out!”
- What did Deadpool bring to the picnic? “Chimichangas, of course!”
- Why is Deadpool so good at math? “Because he’s always adding to his jokes!”
- What does Deadpool like to do with his free time? “Laugh and eat tacos!”
- Why does Deadpool wear a red suit? “Because it’s a superhero’s best look!”
- What’s Deadpool’s favorite type of joke? “Pun-ishing ones!”
Best Picks:
- “What does Deadpool call his best friend? ‘Chimichango.'”
- “Why did Deadpool refuse to get a pet? ‘Because I’m already too ‘paws-itively’ awesome!'”
Deadpool Dad Jokes
- “What did Deadpool say when he saw his old dad? ‘You’re ‘pun’-ishing me with your dad jokes!’”
- “Deadpool walks into the room and says, ‘I’m like a dad—always making bad jokes!’”
- “Why did Deadpool’s dad start a bakery? ‘Because he’s ‘dough’-ing it right!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad tells him: ‘You may be dead inside, but at least you’ve got a ‘pun’-derful sense of humor!’”
- “Deadpool to his dad: ‘I’m not your son, I’m your ‘pun’-ish-ment!’”
- “Why did Deadpool’s dad give him a vacuum cleaner? ‘Because it was time to ‘clean up’ the jokes!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘You better start laughing, or I’ll bring out more puns!’”
- “Why did Deadpool’s dad tell him to start gardening? ‘So you can grow some ‘pun’kins!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says, ‘Son, I’ve got one rule—always finish your ‘pun’!”
- “Deadpool’s dad is a fisherman, so he always says, ‘Reel in the ‘pun’ and hold on tight!’”
- “Deadpool to his dad: ‘I guess I’m your ‘pun’-ishment for a bad joke!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad walks into a room and says, ‘Guess who’s got some ‘pun’-derful news!’”
- “Why did Deadpool’s dad buy a pair of shoes? ‘To walk in ‘pun’ty steps!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad loves jokes so much, he calls his pants ‘pun’ pants!”
- “What does Deadpool’s dad do when he hears a pun? ‘I ‘pun’-der it.’”
- “Deadpool’s dad is famous for saying, ‘It’s all about ‘pun’-derful timing!’”
- “Why did Deadpool’s dad give him a box of tissues? ‘For all your ‘pun’-derful tears!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad loves bad jokes, so he says, ‘Who needs a comedy show when I’ve got puns like these!’”
- “What’s Deadpool’s dad’s favorite hobby? ‘Pun’-ning around!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says, ‘You can’t have too many puns… unless you’re me!’”
Best Picks:
- “Deadpool’s dad tells him: ‘You may be dead inside, but at least you’ve got a ‘pun’-derful sense of humor!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says, ‘Son, I’ve got one rule—always finish your ‘pun’!”
Deadpool Puns Dirty
- “Why did Deadpool make a dirty joke about his sword? ‘Because it’s a sharp one!’”
- “Deadpool says: ‘I’m not here to be clean, I’m here to ‘pun-ish’ you!’”
- “Why did Deadpool wear a tight suit? ‘Because I like my jokes like I like my suits—‘tight’ and dirty!’”
- “Deadpool’s idea of a date night: ‘Chimichangas, some dirty jokes, and maybe a little swordplay!’”
- “Deadpool to a girl: ‘You want to know the dirtiest thing I know? ‘Pun’ishment!”
- “What does Deadpool call it when he’s feeling dirty? ‘A punny situation!’”
- “Deadpool’s dirty joke? ‘I like my puns ‘dirty’, my jokes ‘sharp’, and my chimichangas ‘spicy!’”
- “Deadpool on dating: ‘It’s all fun and games until someone makes a dirty pun!’”
- “What does Deadpool say after a dirty joke? ‘You’ve been ‘pun’-ished!’”
- “Deadpool says: ‘There’s nothing like a dirty joke to make everything better!’”
- “Deadpool’s dirty talk: ‘Are you ready for a sword fight or should I just make more puns?’”
- “Deadpool’s dirty confession: ‘I have an unhealthy obsession with ‘pun’-ishing humor!’”
- “What’s Deadpool’s favorite way to break the ice? ‘A dirty pun, of course!’”
- “Deadpool loves dirty jokes, but he’s got a ‘sharp’ wit to back it up!”
- “Deadpool to the villain: ‘I can make you laugh in one second, and then dirty jokes in the next!’”
- “What does Deadpool say when things get dirty? ‘Let’s clean it up with a good pun!’”
- “Deadpool on relationships: ‘There’s no ‘dirty’ work when you’re this punny!’”
- “Deadpool says: ‘I like it dirty… as long as it involves puns!’”
- “Deadpool and the bad guy: ‘I’ll take you down with my dirty sword… or a dirty pun.’”
- “Deadpool’s response to everything dirty: ‘Pun first, ask questions later!’”
Best Picks:
- “Deadpool says: ‘I like my puns ‘dirty’, my jokes ‘sharp’, and my chimichangas ‘spicy!’”
- “Deadpool’s response to everything dirty: ‘Pun first, ask questions later!’”
Deadpool Dad Jokes One Liners
- “Deadpool to his dad: ‘I’m not dead, just dad-joked to death!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘The only thing better than my dad jokes? ‘Pun’ishing humor!’”
- “Why does Deadpool call his dad ‘the pun-master’? ‘Because he always delivers a ‘pun’ishment.’”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘Why don’t we ever leave? We’ve got ‘pun’-derful jokes to stay for!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘I got one joke… but it’s a ‘pun’-ishing one!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘If you think that’s bad, wait until I tell you another ‘pun’-derful joke!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘Every joke is better with a ‘pun’!'”
- “Why does Deadpool’s dad never stop with the jokes? ‘Because there’s always room for one more ‘pun’!”
- “Deadpool’s dad to his son: ‘You might be dead, but you’re never dead from a dad joke!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘I’ve got a ‘pun’-ishing joke for you… just wait.’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘I’d tell you a joke, but it’s so pun-derful, it’ll break the universe.’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘I could tell you a joke… but it’s a ‘pun’-derful secret!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘Who needs superhero powers when you’ve got ‘pun’-derful dad jokes?’”
- “Why does Deadpool’s dad wear glasses? ‘To ‘see’ better jokes coming!”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘I’m not just a dad, I’m the ‘pun’-isher!”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘I tell jokes with ‘pun’ishment in every punchline!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘I don’t need a superpower, just a ‘pun’-derful sense of humor!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘Every joke needs a ‘pun’ishing ending.’”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘I’ve got a ‘pun’-derful comeback for every dad joke.’”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘What’s a dad’s secret? The ‘pun’-derful delivery of every line!’”
Best Picks:
- “Deadpool’s dad says: ‘Every joke is better with a ‘pun’!’”
- “Deadpool’s dad: ‘Who needs superhero powers when you’ve got ‘pun’-derful dad jokes?’”
